Friday, January 7, 2011

Winston Churchill, Head Coach of The Dallas Cowboys

"Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential."
When Sir Winston Churchill passed away on the morning of Sunday 24th January 1965, many proclaimed that we had lost one of the 20th centuries' greatest leaders forever.

Few know that as soon as Churhill ascended to heaven, he began trilateral talks between himself, Jesus Christ, and God (The Holy Ghost had a previous engagement).

The purpose of these talks was unknown at the time, except to the omniscient and those involved in the discussions.

After over six months of discussion, an agreement was reached. Everyone shook hands, and Churchill hasn't been seen in heaven since.

Of course, no one can be fully sure what was said during the course of these discussions, but a careful analysis of the events afterward can give us an idea:

January 1965: Churchill dies, Trilateral talks begin.

July 1965: Trilateral talks end, Churchill leaves heaven.

March 1966: Jason Calvin Garrett born, 9 months after trilateral talks.

December 1966: The Dallas Cowboys' first winning season and first playoff berth.

The rest, as they say, is history.

"I'm baaaaaack!"
Am I really saying that Winston Churchill convinced God to allow him to return to Earth specifically so that he could positively influence the future of the Dallas Cowboys?

Yes. That's exactly what I'm saying: Garrett is Churchill reincarnate.

If Jerry gives him the tools, Garrett will finish the job.

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